Monday

A Lesson Learned


After an exhausting, but fun filled, girly girl weekend...and I did promise I would post "All about it..and the pics" but we all have to wait till all the proofs have been gone through~
But thought I would give you a sneak peek.....(above)
But upon returning home...and finally listening to my voice messages.... a bit of my happiness...
NO, that is a lie, a HUGE amount of it just deflated.
Listening to my mom cry 2,500 miles away, trying to still be "maternal" and protect me at 41...there really is no easy way to tell your oldest...Daddy's little girl....that 'it's just a matter of time.'  
And you sit there starring at the phone....thinking, planning, crying....
You have to return to work this coming weekend.... Flying back and forth from FL to NJ...
More surgery...
I totaled my Lexus 2 weeks ago.,..and guess what..? Collision was dropped on the insurance policy.
I might add...that I was not the one who did that.
So..ok....I need to get my kids moved...get a new car..start school... get them started..and somehow accept, really accept what is happening in my family. Yet so scared to go... wanting to...but not wanting to see, feel, hear all the pain. I don't want that to haunt me. I feel selfish... but in reality...I don't know where to place all of this.
But I suppose a Higher Power will guide me in the right direction....
And I am ever so grateful for the time spent with old friends...the laughter..the fun.... and I promise....
WAIT TILL YOU SEE IT ALL!  It will be a smiling post...
It's about time right?
Hope you all had a wonderful weekend...
And in linking up with BLUE MONDAY  I just added this little tidbit.
And to my regular followers...thank you for all your love and support...
I love ya right back!


xoxox
C

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